Wednesday, April 25, 2012

THE HORNET RIDE

OK...so when you ride outside, bugs and flying things are always hitting you. Gnats, butterflies, dragonflies...you name it.

About 10 minutes into my ride this afternoon, in fact, a horsefly bounced off my cheek. It feels like someone popping you with a thick rubber band at point blank range...not a good feeling.

But it's a much better feeling that what is throbbing through my scalp as I type this.

18 miles in to a 20 miles ride, a hornet, wasp, bumblebee, SOMETHING, collided with me head on, somehow got inside my helmet, stung me on top of the head, then managed to get around back and sting me on the back of the head, too.

It felt like someone doused my head in gasoline and set it on fire. I didn't know if there was a swarm, how many of them had stung me, or if there were any still in my helmet. I must have screamed some sort of obscenity and slammed on my brakes hard enough to nearly throw me off the bike. I unbuckled my chin strap and threw that helmet on the ground like it was infected with Black Plague.

Then I start slapping myself all over the head because it feels like 50 stingers are stuck on it continuing to pulse their venom into my blood stream. What I would pay to have had that on video...

My goodness...that was awful. I made it home just in time to see my head shape deformed by two huge swollen stings...wonderful.

I may be dead before the sun goes down.
If I die, my final wish is for Blake Lewis, Cliff Compton, Dillon Cobb, and Will Alexander to do an Ironman in my honor.

2 comments:

  1. Bees! Bees! Bees in the car! Bees everywhere! They're huge and they're sting crazy! They're ripping my flesh off! Run away, your firearms are useless against them!

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  2. The time I was mowing the yard in east Plano, getting buzzed by wasps causing me to hit myself in the nose while flailing at the unseen missile, then tripping myself while trying to run for cover isn't quite so funny now, huh? I hope you're ok. take a Benedryl.

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